I sit in front of a blank screen with about 10 different post ideas that I've been turning over and over again in my head. And yet I can't settle on what I want to write about tonight. But I want to write. And then I realized that this conundrum is a perfect metaphor for my life today.
I could sit here and write you my Ode to Chipper Jones and the 2012 Braves season, or pick apart the lyrics to Miranda Lambert's "Over You", describe the shear joy I derived from buying 4 pairs of shoes this weekend, attempt to write an entire post out of only song lyrics, or I could even regale you with the story of how I saved a life this weekend. But none of these seem right for tonight.
So since I don't have the right story for tonight, I will merely throw out a teaser...
There's big news on the horizon. Huge. Let's just say that within 3 months, 2012 will be significant mark on the map of my life story (BTW- Did we ever come up with a name for it?). And no, I'm not just enticing you to come gather 'round people wherever you roam for the big announcement, although please feel free as the present now will soon be the past. There really is something, and it will be a total game changer. It's just too soon to talk about it.
And I'm actually glad. I'm very ready to close the chapter of the last 2 roller coaster years of my life and start the next volume.
So stay tuned...
Monday, April 30, 2012
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Birthday Cones and Milk Bones
First off, Crazy Dog Lady ALERT!
So don't say I didn't warn you...
Today is Mickey's 2nd birthday! Can you believe it? I know, me either! My little boy is getting so big. He's all growed up! As long as you don't count his perpetual fear of his water bowl, the fact that he freezes in terror and urinates anytime he sees a stranger, or the fact that he still carries his stuffed spider to bed with him every night (in the guest room closet).
Yes, he's finally entering those awkward dog-olescent years where he will refuse to take doggie baths, eat enough Purina to feed a horse and be out chasing tails all night. Where does the time go? How do I communicate to my best furry friend how much he means to me and how glad I am that he's in my life? A scoop of peanut butter just doesn't seem to be enough. A lavish party seems somewhat ridiculous - atleast that was the response I got to the Evite I sent out for his party. Maybe I lost everyone at "Party hats required"... As I was willing to provide them, it seemed like a reasonable enough request.
But growing up, we always had a tradition with our dogs on their birthdays that we would take them for ice cream cones. I remember Dad loading us all up, dogs and family, and we would go up to the 31 Flavors and get a vanilla ice cream cone of which all the dogs would get to have a few bites. (And if you were ever curious as to how I got to be such a crazy dog lady, I think that little story just answered any of your outstanding questions). But it was a fun family tradition that we eventually grew out of as I got older and the dogs started getting sent off to some big farm with lots of land for them to run around. Gosh, I sure hope they are still enjoying all that acreage they are playing on!
So I thought it would be fun to start a little birthday tradition of my own with Mickey. He's a good companion to me, and arguably the biggest responsibility in my life, so I want to make sure that he knows he's loved, even if it's only to satisfy my own wants. But hopefully we can come up with something that he and I will do for the next 10 or so years of our lives, and maybe one day it will even be a tradition that we can share with our family as we expand and allow others to join us in our ridiculous ways.
I guess all I wanted to say to the goofiest, most awkward, least intimidating, longest tongued, worst balanced, silliest running, misdirected tailed, non-controlled earred, bed hogging, yet sweetest pup I know is......
Happy Birthday, Mickey!
(And Mickey, if you're reading this...put my laptop away and go practice your power slides!)
So don't say I didn't warn you...
Today is Mickey's 2nd birthday! Can you believe it? I know, me either! My little boy is getting so big. He's all growed up! As long as you don't count his perpetual fear of his water bowl, the fact that he freezes in terror and urinates anytime he sees a stranger, or the fact that he still carries his stuffed spider to bed with him every night (in the guest room closet).
Yes, he's finally entering those awkward dog-olescent years where he will refuse to take doggie baths, eat enough Purina to feed a horse and be out chasing tails all night. Where does the time go? How do I communicate to my best furry friend how much he means to me and how glad I am that he's in my life? A scoop of peanut butter just doesn't seem to be enough. A lavish party seems somewhat ridiculous - atleast that was the response I got to the Evite I sent out for his party. Maybe I lost everyone at "Party hats required"... As I was willing to provide them, it seemed like a reasonable enough request.
But growing up, we always had a tradition with our dogs on their birthdays that we would take them for ice cream cones. I remember Dad loading us all up, dogs and family, and we would go up to the 31 Flavors and get a vanilla ice cream cone of which all the dogs would get to have a few bites. (And if you were ever curious as to how I got to be such a crazy dog lady, I think that little story just answered any of your outstanding questions). But it was a fun family tradition that we eventually grew out of as I got older and the dogs started getting sent off to some big farm with lots of land for them to run around. Gosh, I sure hope they are still enjoying all that acreage they are playing on!
So I thought it would be fun to start a little birthday tradition of my own with Mickey. He's a good companion to me, and arguably the biggest responsibility in my life, so I want to make sure that he knows he's loved, even if it's only to satisfy my own wants. But hopefully we can come up with something that he and I will do for the next 10 or so years of our lives, and maybe one day it will even be a tradition that we can share with our family as we expand and allow others to join us in our ridiculous ways.
I guess all I wanted to say to the goofiest, most awkward, least intimidating, longest tongued, worst balanced, silliest running, misdirected tailed, non-controlled earred, bed hogging, yet sweetest pup I know is......
Happy Birthday, Mickey!
(And Mickey, if you're reading this...put my laptop away and go practice your power slides!)
 |
| "Balancing" on his favorite spot at the dog park |
 |
| NOT helping me read in bed |
 |
| It took me 30 minutes to get him to move so I could go to bed... |
 |
| Mickey fought a raccoon...and lost, but he's still smiling |
Friday, April 13, 2012
Adventures in Wall-E World
So I think that most of us saw the wonderful animated film that came out in 2008 about the loveable trash collecting robot scouring a deserted wasteland and meeting the love of his life, EVE- a robot from outspace where the humans have all migrated to their sedentary, pre-programed lifestyle. So sweet...
But I don't bring up this image of adorable robot romance to highlight a Pixar love story, instead I find myself curious as to whether the creators of Wall-E had already seen what I was introduced to this week.
Get a load of this ship:
Google Glass (work safe, and link is legit)
Now that we're all in the know of Google's latest and greatest undertaking...
I'm not saying that IF Google Glass is actually successfully developed and functional that we are totally destined to be aboard the Axiom (the spaceship in Wall-E), but it's sure taking a step in the right direction. While I have written about my frustrations and confusion with our modern, rapidly advancing technology, this one takes the cake, HANDS DOWN.
It's not enough to have any and all applications and society at our fingertips, but now we need them in front of our faces so that we don't even have to get our daily work out of holding our iPhones and Blackberrys up to our face all day. Nevermind the subculture of extremely lazy, unmotivated humans that this has the potential to turn out, but think about the potential of everything that Google Glass has the power to depreciate.
This is the optimal set up for entire generations that won't know how to read a map, keep a calendar (obviously this one is terrifying to me), research essay topics without an internet search, remember a phone number, recall birthdays, and probably eventually even tell time on a non-digital clock. Augmented reality...REALLY???
I'm not sure how serious to take this newest endeavor by Google, but it certainly seems to be stirring up commotion across the board, both for and against. And if you watched the video and find yourself signing up to be first on the list to try out the first pair, I ask you to really think about if the advantages really outweigh the disadvantages. Other than the soon to be new hipster look, I can't find the benefit of such a product. If Google really wants to start making a difference, how about a tool that prevents cancer? Or one that can build wells in Africa?
I'm sorry Google, but this time you've gone too far for me. If I didn't rely on my Gmail accounts, Gchat, Google Maps and Google Search to get me through my day to day, I would propose a Google blackout for a week. But you've somehow managed to make yourself too relevant to my daily life. I resent you a little bit in this moment.
But for now, all I can say to Google and your Glasses:
Please don't enable my great grandchildren to have to dress like Judy Jetson. And their great grandhildren to live aboard the Axiom.
Just Don't Do It.
 |
| Wook at dos sad wittle eyes.... |
Get a load of this ship:
Google Glass (work safe, and link is legit)
Now that we're all in the know of Google's latest and greatest undertaking...
I'm not saying that IF Google Glass is actually successfully developed and functional that we are totally destined to be aboard the Axiom (the spaceship in Wall-E), but it's sure taking a step in the right direction. While I have written about my frustrations and confusion with our modern, rapidly advancing technology, this one takes the cake, HANDS DOWN.
It's not enough to have any and all applications and society at our fingertips, but now we need them in front of our faces so that we don't even have to get our daily work out of holding our iPhones and Blackberrys up to our face all day. Nevermind the subculture of extremely lazy, unmotivated humans that this has the potential to turn out, but think about the potential of everything that Google Glass has the power to depreciate.
This is the optimal set up for entire generations that won't know how to read a map, keep a calendar (obviously this one is terrifying to me), research essay topics without an internet search, remember a phone number, recall birthdays, and probably eventually even tell time on a non-digital clock. Augmented reality...REALLY???
I'm not sure how serious to take this newest endeavor by Google, but it certainly seems to be stirring up commotion across the board, both for and against. And if you watched the video and find yourself signing up to be first on the list to try out the first pair, I ask you to really think about if the advantages really outweigh the disadvantages. Other than the soon to be new hipster look, I can't find the benefit of such a product. If Google really wants to start making a difference, how about a tool that prevents cancer? Or one that can build wells in Africa?
I'm sorry Google, but this time you've gone too far for me. If I didn't rely on my Gmail accounts, Gchat, Google Maps and Google Search to get me through my day to day, I would propose a Google blackout for a week. But you've somehow managed to make yourself too relevant to my daily life. I resent you a little bit in this moment.
But for now, all I can say to Google and your Glasses:
Please don't enable my great grandchildren to have to dress like Judy Jetson. And their great grandhildren to live aboard the Axiom.
Just Don't Do It.
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
A Frosty Wednesday
I had to memorize this poem in my Freshman American Literature class, and I still remember it to this day. I've caught myself reciting it absentmindedly this week, but I believe it's maybe not as random as I might want to think...
The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
-Robert Frost
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Atlanta's Top Patios
Ok, I've been wanting to write something to commemorate the first day of Spring since it arrived last week. However, the early concepts of a 9,000+ pollen count, 80 degree weather and bringing out the warm weather wardrobe just weren't cutting it.
Soooooo, I decided that the thing I have been most excited about for this spring is the ability to hang out on a patio again. If you aren't familiar with Atlanta, this is a patio town. People WILL go to your establishment for a great patio despite the beer selection, horrible menu, and any other fallacy that you might be commiting. It's all about the patio (luckily for Hudson Grill).
So without further ado, I present to you what I think is the list of the top patios in Atlanta. I welcome suggestions and additions that I can go test out.
1- The Nook
Located directly across the street from Piedmont Park, I discovered the Nook a few years ago when I was playing on a softball team down there. This was our post-game drinking hole. It's got a great view, fantastic people watching, and the food is pretty good as well. Plus, it's about the cheapest in town valet parking. If you haven't tried it, go. But pick a nice sunny day!
2- Leon's Full Service
While downtown Decatur is a bit of a hike for me, I NEVER regret the decision to go out there. And while I don't get to Leon's as often as I would like, it's always on my mind. For me, it's hard to go to Decatur and not end up at the Brickstore, but I love this little patio! Day time, night time, anytime is the right time. And when the big garage doors open up and you can hear the hustle and bustle of the bar inside, you just feel like you are one of those elite few "in the know" about this hot spot. Also, on the other side of the bar, there is another small patio with a bocce ball court. Rock on.
3- The Righteous Room
I know, I know, I know. Those of you in Atlanta who have any idea what this place is are scratching your head right now and saying "Seriously?". As I mentioned, this is MY favorite list. Righteous Room takes the idea of dive bar and brings it down to a whole new level. I've never actually even been inside, no idea if they have food, but the ambiance offered by their communal tables outside is one of a kind. Settled on the corner of N. Highland Ave and Ponce, this is PRIMO people watching territory. The clientele is...diverse. And you can get a $15 pitcher of Guiness. Do not go alone, do not go during daytime (is it even open??) but go. Sit back, relax, meet your table neighbors, and watch the evening unfold.
4- Joes on Juniper
Dogs on a patio? Yes, please! I know there are others in Atlanta where you can take your dogs as well, but this one is my favorite. The location is great, the crowd is lively, and the menu is...not my favorite, but I manage. This is easily one of my favorite spots to meet up with an old friend, grab a few drinks, and enjoy the afternoon. Maybe one day I can even take Mickey with me (if he ever learns decent manners).
5- Cypress Pint and Plate
This is one of the few patios that I actually prefer at night. As you can see, they have a fun fire pit that is pretty much always on, and it lends itself to more of a night time patio. Fantastic drink menu, both beer and cocktails. The food is great as well. Parking however can be a little tough. But if you circle it enough, maybe you will luck out to find one of the metered spots up the street. OR, just make a friend who lives near by. If you haven't been here, go now. Before it gets too hot in the evening to enjoy the warmth of the fire pit.
6- Park Tavern
To be perfectly honest, if it weren't for all of the events and 99 cent drafts on rainy days that Park Tavern offers, I'm not sure they would have made my list. There is just something a little overdone about it. However, there is no denying that a beautiful patio set in Piedmont Park is not a wonderful thing. Parking is not great, beer selection is so-so, but it sure is a great place to sit, see the park and listen to live music. Unplugged in the Park starts back May 6th and already on the lineup for this year are Blair Crimmins and the Hookers and Griffin House. Two shows I will definitely be seeing this year.
7- Uncle Julio's
This may be one that we don't all agree on, but I have spent some great evenings on this patio. My memories of this patio will forever keep it in high standards to me. I used to live about a mile from here and it's also a patio that I prefer in the evenings. The bright colors and even brighter patrons are sure to keep your evening interesting. The food is pretty good and the margaritas are STRONG. And if you've never been on a Friday night...well...why don't you just try it out and let me know what you think. But be prepared, they will run out of frozen margaritas fast! Also, this only applies to the Midtown location, the Sandy Springs location pales in comparison.
8- Six Feet Under
I add this one to my list with this stipulation: I've never actually sat on this patio. However- before you let your jaws drop to the ground in complete disgust that I would dare write about something I don't have first hand experience in...I must tell you - they made me do it! But seriously, I spoke to a few friends as I have been working on this blog and EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON. mentioned this patio. So surely they must be doing something right. And if nothing else, now the mystery has made me want to go try it out. The restaurant itself is great so I'm sure that if you factor in a rooftop patio, it can only get better!
Alright folks, there it is, my tribute to Springtime in Atlanta. For anyone who is wondering why I did not include any Taco Mac on this list, I ask that you please not return to my blog in the future. And if you have any suggestions for me to go try that you think should make the cut, I would love to have them!
Happy Spring, try not to turn yellow!
Soooooo, I decided that the thing I have been most excited about for this spring is the ability to hang out on a patio again. If you aren't familiar with Atlanta, this is a patio town. People WILL go to your establishment for a great patio despite the beer selection, horrible menu, and any other fallacy that you might be commiting. It's all about the patio (luckily for Hudson Grill).
So without further ado, I present to you what I think is the list of the top patios in Atlanta. I welcome suggestions and additions that I can go test out.
1- The Nook
Located directly across the street from Piedmont Park, I discovered the Nook a few years ago when I was playing on a softball team down there. This was our post-game drinking hole. It's got a great view, fantastic people watching, and the food is pretty good as well. Plus, it's about the cheapest in town valet parking. If you haven't tried it, go. But pick a nice sunny day!
2- Leon's Full Service
While downtown Decatur is a bit of a hike for me, I NEVER regret the decision to go out there. And while I don't get to Leon's as often as I would like, it's always on my mind. For me, it's hard to go to Decatur and not end up at the Brickstore, but I love this little patio! Day time, night time, anytime is the right time. And when the big garage doors open up and you can hear the hustle and bustle of the bar inside, you just feel like you are one of those elite few "in the know" about this hot spot. Also, on the other side of the bar, there is another small patio with a bocce ball court. Rock on.
3- The Righteous Room
I know, I know, I know. Those of you in Atlanta who have any idea what this place is are scratching your head right now and saying "Seriously?". As I mentioned, this is MY favorite list. Righteous Room takes the idea of dive bar and brings it down to a whole new level. I've never actually even been inside, no idea if they have food, but the ambiance offered by their communal tables outside is one of a kind. Settled on the corner of N. Highland Ave and Ponce, this is PRIMO people watching territory. The clientele is...diverse. And you can get a $15 pitcher of Guiness. Do not go alone, do not go during daytime (is it even open??) but go. Sit back, relax, meet your table neighbors, and watch the evening unfold.
4- Joes on Juniper
Dogs on a patio? Yes, please! I know there are others in Atlanta where you can take your dogs as well, but this one is my favorite. The location is great, the crowd is lively, and the menu is...not my favorite, but I manage. This is easily one of my favorite spots to meet up with an old friend, grab a few drinks, and enjoy the afternoon. Maybe one day I can even take Mickey with me (if he ever learns decent manners).
5- Cypress Pint and Plate
This is one of the few patios that I actually prefer at night. As you can see, they have a fun fire pit that is pretty much always on, and it lends itself to more of a night time patio. Fantastic drink menu, both beer and cocktails. The food is great as well. Parking however can be a little tough. But if you circle it enough, maybe you will luck out to find one of the metered spots up the street. OR, just make a friend who lives near by. If you haven't been here, go now. Before it gets too hot in the evening to enjoy the warmth of the fire pit.
6- Park Tavern
To be perfectly honest, if it weren't for all of the events and 99 cent drafts on rainy days that Park Tavern offers, I'm not sure they would have made my list. There is just something a little overdone about it. However, there is no denying that a beautiful patio set in Piedmont Park is not a wonderful thing. Parking is not great, beer selection is so-so, but it sure is a great place to sit, see the park and listen to live music. Unplugged in the Park starts back May 6th and already on the lineup for this year are Blair Crimmins and the Hookers and Griffin House. Two shows I will definitely be seeing this year.
7- Uncle Julio's
This may be one that we don't all agree on, but I have spent some great evenings on this patio. My memories of this patio will forever keep it in high standards to me. I used to live about a mile from here and it's also a patio that I prefer in the evenings. The bright colors and even brighter patrons are sure to keep your evening interesting. The food is pretty good and the margaritas are STRONG. And if you've never been on a Friday night...well...why don't you just try it out and let me know what you think. But be prepared, they will run out of frozen margaritas fast! Also, this only applies to the Midtown location, the Sandy Springs location pales in comparison.
8- Six Feet Under
I add this one to my list with this stipulation: I've never actually sat on this patio. However- before you let your jaws drop to the ground in complete disgust that I would dare write about something I don't have first hand experience in...I must tell you - they made me do it! But seriously, I spoke to a few friends as I have been working on this blog and EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON. mentioned this patio. So surely they must be doing something right. And if nothing else, now the mystery has made me want to go try it out. The restaurant itself is great so I'm sure that if you factor in a rooftop patio, it can only get better!
Alright folks, there it is, my tribute to Springtime in Atlanta. For anyone who is wondering why I did not include any Taco Mac on this list, I ask that you please not return to my blog in the future. And if you have any suggestions for me to go try that you think should make the cut, I would love to have them!
Happy Spring, try not to turn yellow!
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
The Death of the "Goodbye"
"So long, Farewell, Auf Weidersehen, Goodbye"
I found myself thinking about the meaning of the word goodbye over the last few days. And it turns out, it doesn't have the same meaning that it used to. I mean, am I right?
Today when you say goodbye, it's more of a ceremony or a ritual than words that you mean. We no longer get the joy of holding onto that last hug or that last "I'll see you soon!" because I know that I'm going to get a text in 5 minutes telling me how bad the traffic is and then I will read about your entire trip home via Twitter. And that's ok. It helps alleviate the challenges that the distance between friends creates.
However, I also believe that this concept serves as a detterent from creating any sense of urgency to see old friends again. Who needs to catch up when you can follow each others lives in pictures online and talk every 5 minutes about what you are doing. What's there to catch up on. Mostly just the past before Facebook timeline was able to document every movement of our day. And we can only tell the same college stories so many times, granted, they will probably still be hilarious. Not to other who weren't there. But to us atleast.
Maybe not the most personal way to handle it, but certainly not the worst.
But what about when you don't want to follow every movement of every day. What about when you need to say goodbye and you need to release these patterns. Can it really be done in today's modern world? Can you really just say goodbye and walk away from anything? If you cancel internet service, you will just get thrown in a database to get contacted over and over again until you sign back up. If you quit the gym they will call and email you constantly to inquire about when you are coming back and what they can do to make your experience better. Even if you move and change your address, you will be filling that address out on official forms and applications for the next 5 years. Goodbye has no real meaning left I believe. It has become and empty threat.
I guess this tied together for me the other night when I was catching up on my Grey's Anatomy (yes, I am one of the 10 viewers that is still following the sagas centered around McSteamy and McDreamy). The guest character watched their husband suffer a slow and painful death as the result of a car accident which left him brain dead. And the seemingly soulless Dr. Yang delivered a monologue about how it would have been easier to have seen the husband die in the car crash, watch a body bag zip up and cart off the remains. Macabre and gruesome...perhaps. But true. There's a sense of closure. A form of goodbye. And if you never really get to say goodbye, how does anything ever end? If goodbye doesn't work, how on EARTH can I get AT&T to stop calling me and asking me to come back to them?
But how can we say goodbye and create and end when there is no way to cut the cord in today's society? Social media, which I have written about on multiple occasions, has taken away our human capacity to say goodbye. Erase that, I won't even put this one on social media. Mainly because I know that if I don't find what I want on Facebook, I will just go out and perform a very simple Google search. Boom, what now?
And as I sit here listening to John Mellencamp's "Thinking About You", I can take this even one step further and identify a phenomenon that I don't think exists anymore:
If we are suffering from a lack of ability to actually say goodbye and move on, we are losing the ability to experience nostalgia. We are too wrapped up in the present. How can you miss something that isn't actually gone? It all feels a little too Kate Winslet in Titanic- "I'll Never Let Go" (mostly because it's not an option).
And on the rare occassion that you actually want to have a real goodbye, that hug at the airport, a drop off at the MARTA Kiss Ride, or that last time your cell phone rings to ask if you want to renew your service, the depth of that once sacred (well, maybe parting ways with the phone company doesn't have the same hallowed experience) act is no longer possible without taking extreme measures. READ: extreme measures means falling off the grid. And if you've read any of my other posts on the social media age, this would basically entail ceasing to exist in the real world.
Sometimes we need to see the body bag. Say goodbye. Be allowed to make a memory that we can hold onto so that we can let go of the rest. The ability to think back on our happy memory, smile about it and not send a text that will inevitably ruin the whole thing (hypothetically speaking, of course).
Closure.
This would be the point in my post where I would say goodbye, bid you adieu, so long, farewell, however you like it best. But I think we all know that you haven't heard the last of me by any means.
So, as goodbye has no meaning, why don't we just go with the more casual, more practical...
Peace out, cub scouts.
P.S.- Don't forget to go see Titanic 3D in theaters, coming this spring. I'll never let go.
I found myself thinking about the meaning of the word goodbye over the last few days. And it turns out, it doesn't have the same meaning that it used to. I mean, am I right?
Today when you say goodbye, it's more of a ceremony or a ritual than words that you mean. We no longer get the joy of holding onto that last hug or that last "I'll see you soon!" because I know that I'm going to get a text in 5 minutes telling me how bad the traffic is and then I will read about your entire trip home via Twitter. And that's ok. It helps alleviate the challenges that the distance between friends creates.
However, I also believe that this concept serves as a detterent from creating any sense of urgency to see old friends again. Who needs to catch up when you can follow each others lives in pictures online and talk every 5 minutes about what you are doing. What's there to catch up on. Mostly just the past before Facebook timeline was able to document every movement of our day. And we can only tell the same college stories so many times, granted, they will probably still be hilarious. Not to other who weren't there. But to us atleast.
Maybe not the most personal way to handle it, but certainly not the worst.
But what about when you don't want to follow every movement of every day. What about when you need to say goodbye and you need to release these patterns. Can it really be done in today's modern world? Can you really just say goodbye and walk away from anything? If you cancel internet service, you will just get thrown in a database to get contacted over and over again until you sign back up. If you quit the gym they will call and email you constantly to inquire about when you are coming back and what they can do to make your experience better. Even if you move and change your address, you will be filling that address out on official forms and applications for the next 5 years. Goodbye has no real meaning left I believe. It has become and empty threat.
I guess this tied together for me the other night when I was catching up on my Grey's Anatomy (yes, I am one of the 10 viewers that is still following the sagas centered around McSteamy and McDreamy). The guest character watched their husband suffer a slow and painful death as the result of a car accident which left him brain dead. And the seemingly soulless Dr. Yang delivered a monologue about how it would have been easier to have seen the husband die in the car crash, watch a body bag zip up and cart off the remains. Macabre and gruesome...perhaps. But true. There's a sense of closure. A form of goodbye. And if you never really get to say goodbye, how does anything ever end? If goodbye doesn't work, how on EARTH can I get AT&T to stop calling me and asking me to come back to them?
But how can we say goodbye and create and end when there is no way to cut the cord in today's society? Social media, which I have written about on multiple occasions, has taken away our human capacity to say goodbye. Erase that, I won't even put this one on social media. Mainly because I know that if I don't find what I want on Facebook, I will just go out and perform a very simple Google search. Boom, what now?
And as I sit here listening to John Mellencamp's "Thinking About You", I can take this even one step further and identify a phenomenon that I don't think exists anymore:
Don’t mean no troubleWe aren't allowed to wonder about anything anymore. Just for a second, let's pretend that you are even able to have someone years in your past (presumably because they were not on Facebook when you thought about them and went to look them up), but your next move wouldn't be to call them- I'm not even sure that is a socially acceptable practice anymore. You would find an email address or phone number (again, probably from your Google search) and text them. New Age Nostalgia, or something of the like.
Don’t want to bother you none
Ain’t looking for nothing
Just wondering about you some
If you ain’t got time
To return this call
I understand
That you’re busy and all
But thanks for the memories
If we are suffering from a lack of ability to actually say goodbye and move on, we are losing the ability to experience nostalgia. We are too wrapped up in the present. How can you miss something that isn't actually gone? It all feels a little too Kate Winslet in Titanic- "I'll Never Let Go" (mostly because it's not an option).
And on the rare occassion that you actually want to have a real goodbye, that hug at the airport, a drop off at the MARTA Kiss Ride, or that last time your cell phone rings to ask if you want to renew your service, the depth of that once sacred (well, maybe parting ways with the phone company doesn't have the same hallowed experience) act is no longer possible without taking extreme measures. READ: extreme measures means falling off the grid. And if you've read any of my other posts on the social media age, this would basically entail ceasing to exist in the real world.
Sometimes we need to see the body bag. Say goodbye. Be allowed to make a memory that we can hold onto so that we can let go of the rest. The ability to think back on our happy memory, smile about it and not send a text that will inevitably ruin the whole thing (hypothetically speaking, of course).
Closure.
This would be the point in my post where I would say goodbye, bid you adieu, so long, farewell, however you like it best. But I think we all know that you haven't heard the last of me by any means.
So, as goodbye has no meaning, why don't we just go with the more casual, more practical...
Peace out, cub scouts.
P.S.- Don't forget to go see Titanic 3D in theaters, coming this spring. I'll never let go.
Monday, March 12, 2012
I'm Just a Girl, in the World
I've never really been much of one to be sensitive to gender inequalities. I just kind of always did what I wanted as a kid and these things never really phased me. I remember there was always that one girl in classes growing up that when the teacher would ask for a few boys to help her carry some heavy stuff inside, she would always raise her hand and say "Just because I'm a girl doesn't mean I can't help too!". And would then proceed to try and carry the biggest heaviest boxes in. Let me set the record straight, I was NEVER this girl. I was perfectly happy sitting in the classroom and cutting up while the teacher ran errands.
Although, in Middle School gym though, I did usually ask to play sports with the boys during PE (Physical Education for those of you home schoolers out there) time because I couldn't stand the giggly girls who would pretend they had no idea what to do with a giant rubber ball during kickball. Seriously, what were the options? There are no words for the level of hair-pulling frustration I felt when these girls would just stand there and watch the ball roll by their feet and then whine (emphasis on the whine) about how they weren't able to kick it, or that they would get their sneakers dirty if they played. If you can't make foot-to-ball contact with a 10" diameter rubber sphere, then we have far wider ranging problems than PE class. But that wasn't a gender issue, it was more of "These girls are wasting my time when I could be developing some seriously useful recreational game skillz" issue. How was I ever going to perfect my Wall Ball or Handball talents if I was constantly subjected to such a low level of play??
Of course, as soon as it was time to record our times on the mile run, I was happy to be judged to the slower girls standards. If there had been even an alternate category that I could have been dropped to, I was all for it. Maybe they could put me in the wheel chair category to compare my times against? That's of course assuming that I didn't figure out it was Mile Day and find a way to fake sick first.
However, this past weekend, I had a brief moment of experiencing that sentiment of gender inequality that Little Suzie Lifts a Lot must have felt back in the 3rd grade when she wasn't targeted to help carry in boxes. I was on the softball field, running some drills with my 10U All Star girls - in what I would call a very Head Coachly fashion - when a man that I did not recognize just wandered onto my field. No biggie, people do this, it's a busy park. Until he came over to me in the middle of me working with my girls, pulled me away from what I was doing with my team and said these words: "You must be the Team Mom, I have money for uniforms for you".
I'm sorry, what part of THIS says team mom to you!?!? Let's dismiss the fact that I'm 26 and these girls are 10-11. I'm on the field hitting grounders, you've sat here and watched me instruct my other coaches how to run these drills, AND, since Captain Obvious didn't leave any presents under your Christmas tree this year, I even wore my bright red shirt that says COACH on it today.
Luckily I had my sunglasses on. I say "luckily" because the fire death ray stares that he would have been hit with could have been enough to smite him on the spot. I quickly realized that I knew all the parents of my girls but had no idea who this person was. "No, I'm the Coach. And you are?" He said "Jane's Dad". Great, I don't have a Jane on my team. As I broke the news to him that I was neither the Team Mom, nor Jane's coach, he proceeded to argue with me on both points. I work very hard to be a good role model for my girls, but given this man's brash attitude and condescending demeanor, I was about ready to cover how to deliver a decent right hook in the appropriate bodily region instead of Infield One Hop drills.
When the man finally had no choice but to acknowledge that his child was in fact not on my field and I was not going to take the uniform check that his wife had clearly forced into his hand in a very obnoxiously marked envelope "Jane's Uniform Money. Practice. Sunday. Give to Team Mom. DO NOT FORGET!", I had a certain sense of pride in asking him to kindly leave my field so that I could resume my practice.
The funny thing is that one of the moms came to me at the end of the Fall season and told me that she did not appreciate that we use the term "Team Mom" and wished that we would change it to "Team Parent". She felt it was sexist. As of this morning, I have made an official request with the Board to make this correction.
Also important to note: From this point forward, I'll be sure to also ask the mothers if they would like to help me carry equipment to and from the field. I would hate to be hypocritical here :)
Although, in Middle School gym though, I did usually ask to play sports with the boys during PE (Physical Education for those of you home schoolers out there) time because I couldn't stand the giggly girls who would pretend they had no idea what to do with a giant rubber ball during kickball. Seriously, what were the options? There are no words for the level of hair-pulling frustration I felt when these girls would just stand there and watch the ball roll by their feet and then whine (emphasis on the whine) about how they weren't able to kick it, or that they would get their sneakers dirty if they played. If you can't make foot-to-ball contact with a 10" diameter rubber sphere, then we have far wider ranging problems than PE class. But that wasn't a gender issue, it was more of "These girls are wasting my time when I could be developing some seriously useful recreational game skillz" issue. How was I ever going to perfect my Wall Ball or Handball talents if I was constantly subjected to such a low level of play??
Of course, as soon as it was time to record our times on the mile run, I was happy to be judged to the slower girls standards. If there had been even an alternate category that I could have been dropped to, I was all for it. Maybe they could put me in the wheel chair category to compare my times against? That's of course assuming that I didn't figure out it was Mile Day and find a way to fake sick first.
However, this past weekend, I had a brief moment of experiencing that sentiment of gender inequality that Little Suzie Lifts a Lot must have felt back in the 3rd grade when she wasn't targeted to help carry in boxes. I was on the softball field, running some drills with my 10U All Star girls - in what I would call a very Head Coachly fashion - when a man that I did not recognize just wandered onto my field. No biggie, people do this, it's a busy park. Until he came over to me in the middle of me working with my girls, pulled me away from what I was doing with my team and said these words: "You must be the Team Mom, I have money for uniforms for you".
I'm sorry, what part of THIS says team mom to you!?!? Let's dismiss the fact that I'm 26 and these girls are 10-11. I'm on the field hitting grounders, you've sat here and watched me instruct my other coaches how to run these drills, AND, since Captain Obvious didn't leave any presents under your Christmas tree this year, I even wore my bright red shirt that says COACH on it today.
Luckily I had my sunglasses on. I say "luckily" because the fire death ray stares that he would have been hit with could have been enough to smite him on the spot. I quickly realized that I knew all the parents of my girls but had no idea who this person was. "No, I'm the Coach. And you are?" He said "Jane's Dad". Great, I don't have a Jane on my team. As I broke the news to him that I was neither the Team Mom, nor Jane's coach, he proceeded to argue with me on both points. I work very hard to be a good role model for my girls, but given this man's brash attitude and condescending demeanor, I was about ready to cover how to deliver a decent right hook in the appropriate bodily region instead of Infield One Hop drills.
When the man finally had no choice but to acknowledge that his child was in fact not on my field and I was not going to take the uniform check that his wife had clearly forced into his hand in a very obnoxiously marked envelope "Jane's Uniform Money. Practice. Sunday. Give to Team Mom. DO NOT FORGET!", I had a certain sense of pride in asking him to kindly leave my field so that I could resume my practice.
The funny thing is that one of the moms came to me at the end of the Fall season and told me that she did not appreciate that we use the term "Team Mom" and wished that we would change it to "Team Parent". She felt it was sexist. As of this morning, I have made an official request with the Board to make this correction.
Also important to note: From this point forward, I'll be sure to also ask the mothers if they would like to help me carry equipment to and from the field. I would hate to be hypocritical here :)
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